I made it home safely, Praise God but not with the happiest of news.
On Thursday once I got back into Managua we contacted Isamar's dad to arrange meeting him. He was not reachable until 7:30 at night. He had changed his mind and decided he was not going to see me.
He told my translator that he knows that we could give her a better life and all the things he could not but she was his blood and in his eyes that being with him was the best thing for her. He was not nice about his words and made sure he stated it in a very direct way.
He went on to say that if he is not her dad he will file adoption papers for her.
Luckily, there is not way in the world he could adopt her because he does not meet the requirements.
My attorney is meeting with Mi Familia on Monday to discuss what the process is. Will they just hand her over? Will they investigate him? Will Isamar have a say in all this? As of now I am being told they just hand her over. I find that hard to understand but the laws in Nicaragua are different and they just passed a new law that states they can not take kids away or not give them back due to poverty.
This has truly been a difficult week for me. It's hard to stay positive when you have no control over things but I am learning more and more about trusting God. He is in control of Isamar's life, he knew her future before she was created and he can see the future I can not. Who knows it might be that Isamar grows up to change the lives of other children in orphanages there.
My flesh says well of course we are best for her but my heart says that's up to God.
So for now we wait and trust.
My prayer is that God knows the plan for Isamar's life and if it is to be with us he will change the dad's heart. If not and Isamar is to live with him he will change my heart.
Carmen’s life will still be with us. Her family will not protest this and she will be declared abandoned. It will be extremely difficult for her to leave her sister and furthermore I have great concern for Isamar’s mental stability. She will be the one the most hurt in all this. She will be left behind, lose access to her sister and be forced to live with a family she does not even know and does not want to be with.
Please pray with me in agreement that God's plan for these girls will be done. As much as I want to pray they will both be here I know in my heart this is not a time to be selfish but to be in tune with God's will. Not my will Lord but yours... This is extremely hard for me... pray for me.
I am trying hard to see the Good in all this. IF Isamar's dad takes her at least she will not be in the walls of the orphanage any more. Her father’s mother told us yesterday that I am welcome in her life any time I want. Two days before that she told my translator that I was not welcomed in her home so God is obviously working. God is the only one who can change the outcome of all this.
The DNA test is Monday at 10:00. The results take about a week. I hope to hear something by Friday of next week.
Thanks for your prayers, support and encouraging words you emailed me. I needed them so bad.
I'll update you as soon as I have something.